Please post any comments, critique, and other feedback here for [Lr] Week 327: Event Cascade by Beaks.
Woo, talk about a good start. I accidentally started with a later chapter, but this writing piece wraps up every question I had.
The Sharpe brothers are set up as formidable antagonists, though I like that they aren't cartoonishly villainous; they still hold affection for one another, they still feel like real people just conducting business, as nasty as that business might be. That being said, I appreciate the way you wrote Chase this chapter, where the nervousness is at a high and we get direct confirmation that Elias unsettles them. Between Elias assaulting them and misgendering them, it was a well-written balance of uncomfortable and intimidating.
Great stuff!
The Sharpe brothers are set up as formidable antagonists, though I like that they aren't cartoonishly villainous; they still hold affection for one another, they still feel like real people just conducting business, as nasty as that business might be. That being said, I appreciate the way you wrote Chase this chapter, where the nervousness is at a high and we get direct confirmation that Elias unsettles them. Between Elias assaulting them and misgendering them, it was a well-written balance of uncomfortable and intimidating.
Great stuff!
Right from the off, the tale of Chase took hold of me by the scruff of the neck and yanked me into their tale. There was no wordy preamble, no obfuscating the story. I feel like I was propelled into Chase's world and their struggles. The mixture of emotion and description was well-balanced too.
There's an immediacy to your writing that I can only aspire to, sir. You have a hold of me now and I am looking forward to continuing the tale. Your writing is an asset to the site!
There's an immediacy to your writing that I can only aspire to, sir. You have a hold of me now and I am looking forward to continuing the tale. Your writing is an asset to the site!