Reviewed [Oc/Be] Week 192: A Voyage Towards Destiny - Feedback

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Staff member
Feb 18, 2008
This one must have been a long time coming. I always appreciate little character bonding moments, and although brief, this helps contextualize the camaraderie that Aeria and Ignis showed at Krevati. It doesn't become as much of a problem in a scene with only two characters, but remember to give a little more description of your characters. Ignis I know fairly well, because I've graded Dys for so long, but a newer or more-infrequent reader might have trouble picturing her. Aeria is a little more of an enigma to me.

It's rare that I'll compliment vocabulary, but there were a few spots in here where each of you used a word I wasn't expecting that fit rather well. It's a good kind of surprise.

Ignis sleep-snuggling a shirtless Aeria was rather more innocent than that phrase would suggest, and was a sweet way to close the collab.

Writing Week is 214

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