Reviewed [Collab] Week 402: Terminus Tour Guide - Feedback
- Thread starter Aeria Luxus
- Start date
I hate to be so brief when it's been so long before giving feedback, but there's not a lot to say. I enjoyed this, and Inks, you do a great job playing the two sides of Lea's trauma, the internal and the external. The way he frets over the halberd is particularly well-played, and especially the unwanted murdery image.
For Aeria's part, I've picked up on something that has bothered me a little bit, but I want to preface it with the fact that her character in this situation is great, and as someone who was put on the run, it's kind of nice to see her able to not only walk in the open but show someone else around. The thing that picks at me, though, is realizing that Aeria frequently talks as if she's an interviewer, and it comes across like she has little perspective of her own (since, in an interview, it's expected to focus on the interviewed party).
That sort of perspective plays perfectly into Laermont, as a detective. He can use that sort of approach to get information out of people if not interrogating them directly. For Aeria, though, it feels weird. Take time to talk more about the way she feels or thinks, rather than always asking for others' and agreeing with them.
For Aeria's part, I've picked up on something that has bothered me a little bit, but I want to preface it with the fact that her character in this situation is great, and as someone who was put on the run, it's kind of nice to see her able to not only walk in the open but show someone else around. The thing that picks at me, though, is realizing that Aeria frequently talks as if she's an interviewer, and it comes across like she has little perspective of her own (since, in an interview, it's expected to focus on the interviewed party).
That sort of perspective plays perfectly into Laermont, as a detective. He can use that sort of approach to get information out of people if not interrogating them directly. For Aeria, though, it feels weird. Take time to talk more about the way she feels or thinks, rather than always asking for others' and agreeing with them.