Grading Session for Week 332

[swaswj]

Group 5 -> Group 4 -> Group 3 -> Group 1 -> Group 2 -> Group 5

Group 1 (Will): 1st/5th/9th Divisions
Group 2 (Rob): 2nd/3rd/6th/11th Divisions
Group 3 (Drag): 7th/10th/12th Divisions
Group 4 (Hiren): 4th/8th/13th Divisions
Group 5 (Bunz): AHs/Vizards/Quincies
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Grades are due by 11:59 PM EST on Tuesday, 3 June 2014



Note the updated Grading Rules here.

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[swaswj]

Sorry for the delay and short comments. I thought someone else was grading.

Rob - 50/55

The first sentence reads a little oddly. It's trying to say two different things, but the second thing is kinda shoved in the middle of the first. I'd recommend breaking them apart, like below:

“Ojou-sama,” the elderly voice of a man who wasn’t a stranger to serving others called out to the visage before him.

"Ojou-sama," the elderly man called out to the visage before him. His was the voice of a man who wasn't a stranger to serving others.

I find this chapter... odd. It's almost wholly at odds with the image of Nana in everything I can think of that I've read. I honestly couldn't picture Nana in my mind when reading this: instead I was picturing Kiryuuin Satsuki and her butler. If it was meant to be a character piece to give an image of Nana in a quiet moment, in contrast to the prior chapter where she was hard at work, it just feels too out of place with the character I already know.

Porcelain Meeting (1105) 50/55
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[OssumBunz]

Covering my bases and saying no one wrote