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Redfin

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This was a fun chapter with lots of cute interactions between the characters. While I don't know Micali and her friends well, this chapter did a lot to establish them. And I came in at an interesting time when Micali is trying to reinvent herself. It's done well. I could get a sense of how distant she was before despite living with those people for a while.

Her slowly making friends over the course of the card game was cute. I have no idea how practical that card game is, but I enjoyed it as a thing in the world that people do for fun.

I enjoyed the slow pace of the chapter with characters hanging out being themselves and sort of riffing. The two parts felt different but both were important to drawing Micali out more. It was a good get to know the character chapter.



One grammatical issue I should point out is how to do spoken dialogue in the middle of sentences. I'll take your paragraph here:

Paulo wasted no time in jotting down his answer as Magno let out a plea for “the stew! Please, Vis, the stew is so good and we have all the ingredients.” He turned to see his brother hold up his own answer - pie - and let out a mumbled “traitor…” as he turned to watch Micali, whose stomach rumbled at the realization that she’d forgotten to actually get a meal earlier.
When the spoken dialogue comes in the middle of a sentence, it should be capitalized because the spoken sentence is a new sentence. There should be a comma separating the spoken part from the prose part. So the paragraph above would be:

Paulo wasted no time in jotting down his answer as Magno let out a plea for,The stew! Please, Vis, the stew is so good and we have all the ingredients.” He turned to see his brother hold up his own answer - pie - and let out a mumbled,Traitor…” as he turned to watch Micali, whose stomach rumbled at the realization that she’d forgotten to actually get a meal earlier.
 

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