Please post any comments, critique, and other feedback here for Week 384: The First Move Is Made by MoonlitRain014.
Reviewed Week 384: The First Move Is Made - Feedback
- Thread starter MoonlitRain014
- Start date
I have a big batch of comments coming up. Some of them will be short, but I wanted to get caught up on everything. Only ... 16 months late on this one.
I'm noticing a lot more imagery and colorful language, but there's still a lot of gray. That fits for a more noir vibe, and noir would certainly fit Laermont. If you wanted to go that angle, emphasizing the darks and the lights can elevate the imagery. This was a somewhat abrupt story, so I'll keep the comments short. Particularly since I'm so, so far behind on giving feedback.
I'm noticing a lot more imagery and colorful language, but there's still a lot of gray. That fits for a more noir vibe, and noir would certainly fit Laermont. If you wanted to go that angle, emphasizing the darks and the lights can elevate the imagery. This was a somewhat abrupt story, so I'll keep the comments short. Particularly since I'm so, so far behind on giving feedback.