Please post any comments, critique, and other feedback here for Week 386: Second Strike by MoonlitRain014.
Reviewed Week 386: Second Strike - Feedback
- Thread starter MoonlitRain014
- Start date
You know what, this will be a review for a few of your chapters. This will go all the way back to Into Shadows (1), though I'm putting it all here.
Into Shadows is an interesting piece. To me, it feels sort of like the end of a horror video game where it suddenly shifts into action. You spent all this time hiding from the monsters, but now you have a gun and a means to fight back. The first person narrative of it really added to the fun and tense experience. There was good action and introspection on what to do.
Also, heh, xixty. It's probably a typo, but it gives me a strange idea for a misdirection if it read xixteen.
I guess the ending is setting up for more conflict with those things later on.
The First Move is Made
A little bit of good old spycraft and accident-causing. This was a fun chapter from a villains point. It really evokes those spy movies.
The Second Strike
Now this is where the villain meets the hero. I like how this connects directly to the previous chapter. I guess Aeria is a lot tougher than the assassin thought. That was a snappy action scene with quick pacing. I guess now it's time to find out some more information. Maybe.
Into Shadows is an interesting piece. To me, it feels sort of like the end of a horror video game where it suddenly shifts into action. You spent all this time hiding from the monsters, but now you have a gun and a means to fight back. The first person narrative of it really added to the fun and tense experience. There was good action and introspection on what to do.
Also, heh, xixty. It's probably a typo, but it gives me a strange idea for a misdirection if it read xixteen.
I guess the ending is setting up for more conflict with those things later on.
The First Move is Made
A little bit of good old spycraft and accident-causing. This was a fun chapter from a villains point. It really evokes those spy movies.
The Second Strike
Now this is where the villain meets the hero. I like how this connects directly to the previous chapter. I guess Aeria is a lot tougher than the assassin thought. That was a snappy action scene with quick pacing. I guess now it's time to find out some more information. Maybe.
Loving the vibe that is set at the beginning of the chapter. The battle, though brief, felt snappy and intense. After that, I'm caught off-guard by how completely the assassin's demeanor changes. In the previous chapter and the beginning of this one, the assassin is calm, calculating, and patient. From the moment she wakes up, though, she acts like a different person, like a random thug off the street rather than an assassin.