Release Submission Thread

[Chiisu]

My changes, for your approval, Louhi. ^_^ Changes summarized for your ease of reading.

Vincent Kreuz Shikai - 黒曜石 - 'Kokuyousen' (Obsidian)

Form:

-Removed the line about being hard to heal.

Ability: Brennende Schneide (Burning Blade)

-For 1% of his reiatsu, Vincent can cause his sword to ignite. The obsidian blade begins to glow a deep red, and after charging for a moment, the sword bursts into flame. This increases the cutting power of the blade, subsequently increasing the damage it can do (to souls, people, and solid objects). Because of the intense heat, any cuts a person receives are instantly cauterized. However, the burn left by the sword are extremely painful, slowing the victim down depending on the severity and location of the burns. Vincent is immune to all flames produced by his sword. This lasts for 5 turns, after which Vincent must spend another 1% of his reiatsu to maintain the ignition for another 5 turns.

-Fire resistance removed, cost fixed at 1%

Ability: Brenende Kraftlinien (Burning Leylines)

-At any time, Vincent may spend 3% of his reiatsu to activate this ability. The obsidian blade begins glows bright red. Vincent may then draw any number of lines, summing up to a maximum of 12 feet, into the ground. When he first carves the lines into the ground, they glow red, but fade to black when completed. The lines may be drawn in any shape. Whenever any part of a person other than Vincent passes over these lines (within 15 ft max of the line), fire and molten rock violently erupt from under the line. The eruption runs the length of the line and is as tall as the detection height. Vincent may shorten the detection height by will as he draws the lines, but once drawn, they cannot be changed.

The lines last for 3 turns, after which they fade unless Vincent spends 1% of his reiatsu to maintain them. While there are any lines still active, Vincent may not ignite his sword, though it may still be heated. The total length of line increases by 2 feet every 500 connection to a max of 30 feet, and the detection height increases by 3 feet every 500 connection, to a maximum of 30 feet. Vincent may dismiss the lines at any time. Any attack directed at the lines with a power greater than 3% of Vincent's reiatsu will break the line, dismissing it automatically.

-Fixed cost at 3%, lines can be broken by attacks of 3% Vince's rei

Attack: Brennende Bombe (Burning Bomb)

-When Kokuyousen is lit, Vincent can spend 2% of his reiatsu to amplify the power of the fire on the blade, and then compress it into a ball at the end of the blade. He may then launch it from the sword by simply swinging it. The fireball will travel until a) it hits a solid object, b) gravity pulls it to the ground, or c) Vincent wills it to detonate. The fireball detonates when it hits a solid object or when Vincent wills it so. The detonation has a blast radius of 5 feet. Anyone within 2x the blast radius is not directly hurt, but will receive burns from the intense release of heat

-Removed re-ignition cost, fixed blast radius at 5 ft.

 

[Kishyotai]

With the changes suggested by Beth. And with bold removed.

[ Douten Setsumei Amaji ]
An Event Which Shakes Heaven, Fate Cutter, Path Through the Heavens

[ Form / Ability ]

Setsumei Amaji’s blade, in the flash of light, materializes into a spear. The shaft of the spear is made of an earthy reddish material, exquisitely detailed in gold with pictures of an eagle becoming a phoenix while beset by attacks from dragons. The spear, which combines characteristics of a qiang and a su yari, has a blade which seems to be made of diamond or a similarly transparent crystal; a light seems to be trapped in the crystal, making it a weak source of illumination. Additionally, the spear has a flowing crimson red tassel with gold trim hanging from the pommel.

The spear is very difficult to handle, and Masato’s ability to use the spear is dictated by his ability to use the kai in general – but when mastered, the spear affords incredible maneuverability and striking power.

This is just the corporeal form of Douten Setsumei Amaji. The true power of the release lies within the unspeakable amounts of hakyuukouka – the chaotic energy that propelled Masato’s shi kai – that floods the area surrounding Masato. The range of the field is vast, a radial range of 1.5 meters per 1k Connection (max attained at kai mastery).

Within this range, the spear (and to a lesser extent, Masato's body) acts as a catalyst for chaos within the area. Any movement can, at Masato’s whim, send a wave of hakyuukouka crashing towards the enemy (the different types of strikes one can make with a spear define the ‘shape’ of the wave – the different amount of force Masato uses also defines how much potential of the energy he uses). The chaotic energy in this form is a tidal wave of colliding reiatsu currents – thus, not only does it apply pressure as a force, but it also cuts opponents with compounding arbitrarily-pathed lacerations (it seems as if the wave eats away at any substance it touches that doesn't have sufficient resistance). The speed of the wave and it's cutting power relies on Masato's Zanjutsu, while the crashing force of the wave depends on Masato's current Reiatsu. Weaker opponents will naturally be cut and/or pushed more while stronger opponents will be cut and/or pushed less.

The wave of chaos functions much like a wave of liquid – crashing into any barrier, and wrapping around obstructions with limited width. When the wave reaches the end of the kai’s range, the energy fizzles and dissipates almost immediately – leaving nothing but an area with warmer temperature.

This manipulation of hakyuukouka costs Masato 2% of his Reiatsu per turn that the hakyuukouka is affected – energy required to start the chain reactions that drive the chaos. Additionally, as the waves become more intense, the random agitation of the hakyuukouka becomes more visible in the air – at high levels of manipulation, the air appears slightly ‘foggy’ as if one was looking through steam. Masato can choose to make less 'intense' chaos within the waves, weakening them - this doesn't change the cost of manipulation per turn. Only an opponent of considerably higher Zanjutsu or Reiatsu (1.5x) will be able to detect the wave's general location and speed by instinct.​

 

[RaleighDurham]

Shikai

Name: Macumazahn

Release Command: Let their blood drip from your fingertips Macumazahn

Manifestation: Macumazahn takes the form of an armored grizzly bear. The armor is a soft silver color with blue accents; it is simple and covers the vitals and the face. Macumazahn is wise and slow to speak and has a stately presence that commands respect and despises fear. He is doesn't anger easily but when he does he is wrathful and takes no prisoners.

Form: Appears as a Buff's Head Khukuri. This is the largest and heaviest Khukuri or kukri made in Nepal or even in the world. The blade is remarkably long measuring 36" from hilt to tip with an 11" live oak core wood handle. It is used for chopping off the head of Buffaloes in one blow during the sacrificial ceremonies, Dashain (Greatest Festival of Hindus especially Nepalese people). Therefore it is known as Buff's head. The scabbard is made of Buffalo leather covered cotton-wood. It weighs approximately 6 kilos. Carved in the blade is a huge male lion impaled on a great kudu buck yet still alive and clawing at the beast's vitals.

Attack 1: "Snows of Chomolungma" For the cost of 5% reiatsu thick snowy mists surround the opponent and the area of fighting making it nigh impossible to see to all in the field other than Raleigh until you reach the edge where you can see as normal. The size of the field increases with Raleigh's strength.

Attack 2: "The Storm of the Martial Race" Upon engaging the Snows of Chomolungma Macumazahn can produce up to 5 24 in kukris made of ice that attack from within the storm like hail. This attack costs an extra 5% reiatsu. The blades do damage equal to 1/5 of 5% of the reiatsu cost and are not garunteed to hit, as Raleigh's skill increases the strength and number of the blades increases as well by 1 blade per 1000 reiatsu and 5% per 1000 reiatsu.

Ability 3: "The Strength of a Warrior" Upon engaging this ability Raleigh's Hohou and Zanpaktou stats increase in a 2:1 ratio to the cost of 1% up to a 10% increase in the stats costing 5% reiatsu. This effect lasts for 5 turns. As Raleigh's strength increases the limit on the percentage will increase as will the length of time it is effective.

 

[louhi]

Week 51
​

sen - your abilities are way too expensive and your math is all weird. i'll help you to fix it next time i see you on AIM but in the mean time you should read the release FAQ that moot made because from the looks of it, you didn't D:


lambo - approved


random - edit and resubmit

i guess you had your own reasons not to follow the advice i gave you last week, but this kai still isn't approvable.

if you want to have a stat boost, the maximum you can boost it by in a 3 ability kai is 5%. (this is explained in the techniques and kais thread in the cardinal spirit library section. there is a link to it in the first post of this thread.)

the deflecting ability is still fine

heaven's strike: this is where i'm confused why you wouldn't take my advice. in case you didn't understand it before... leaping up into the air like a pole vaulter and coming down to slash at someone is a normal move. anyone can do it, and it costs nothing. you just have to write your character performing that action. if you include that as part of your attack, you're making the attack so that it can ONLY be used when your character jumps up in the air and comes down, thus rendering it extremely restrictive and not very useful.

rather than that, something like: "For a cost of 100 reiatsu, Aikugi releases a shockwave into whatever it strikes." with an attack like that, you can use it while jumping, running, parrying, whatever. if you still would rather have it the way you wrote, you can do that. im just telling you cause it will be very hard to fight with it like that, you see?


thusdus - edit, resubmit

ability 1: i'm not sure what you mean by the first sentence, about 'simple constructs', this seems vague as if you don't intend to be only making bullets and grenades, but then you don't mention anything else. so just change the 'constructs' to 'bullets and grenades'. more than that would be too much in this case.

rather than a percentile cost, i suggest a flat one, like 50 reiatsu per bullet. a percentile might be fine for the grenade, but i suggest lowering it to 2 or 3%.

ability 2: there are two abilities in here. 3% is a lot just to make a dagger, 1 % would be fine. im assuming you mean one in each hand, not two in each hand, cause holding two daggers in each hand seems really awkward...

the invisibility ability has nothing to do with the daggers and can't occupy the same slot.


cheese - approved


kish - approved




raleigh - edit, resubmit

first off i suggest you read through moot's release FAQ as well as taking another look at the techniques and kais thread, because it seems like you might have missed some things.

form: fine

attack 1: (really an ability, but thats not a big deal). this is fine, but you've made it way too expensive. there are actually a couple of kidou that serve a similar effect (blue mist and break of dusk), both of which cost less than 100 reiatsu, the only major difference being that yours allows your character to see through it, and presumably yours covers a larger area. since you didn't specify, the range should cap out at 50 feet. a flat cost of 100 is plenty.

attack 2: the basic idea here is fine but the math is all weird. you don't need to calculate how much damage a knife does when it stabs somebody. since its your kai, it will do the same damage when it hits as it would if you were holding the knife and stabbing someone. obv, this damage becomes greater as your character gains strength, no calculations are needed #_#

again its awfully expensive. i suggest either a flat cost per kulkuri or a lower percentage.

ability 3: see the section about stat boosts in the technique and kai thread. honestly several other people have looked at this and couldn't make heads or tails of your numbers here, but needless to say it doesn't follow the stat boost rules.

 

[RaleighDurham]

Ok, So I adjusted the first two abilities and completely changed the third after reading more carefully over the FAQ. Thanks for the advice louhi it helped, I was way off on the costs and when I read the third one even I had to take a minute to translate my own words so thanks again and here you go....

Shikai

Name: Macumazahn

Release Command: Let their blood drip from your fingertips Macumazahn

Manifestation: Macumazahn takes the form of an armored grizzly bear. The armor is a soft silver color with blue accents; it is simple and covers the vitals and the face. Macumazahn is wise and slow to speak and has a stately presence that commands respect and despises fear. He is doesn’t anger easily but when he does he is wrathful and takes no prisoners.

Form: Macumazahn appears as a Buff's Head Khukuri. This is the largest and heaviest kukri made in Nepal or even in the world. The blade is remarkably long measuring 36" from hilt to tip with an 11" live oak core wood handle. It is used for chopping off the head of Buffaloes in one blow during the sacrificial ceremonies, Dashain (Greatest Festival of Hindus especially Nepalese people). Therefore it is known as Buff's head. The scabbard is made of Buffalo leather covering cotton-wood. It weighs approximately 6 kilos. Carved in the blade is a huge male lion impaled on a great kudu buck yet still alive and clawing at the beast’s vitals.

Ability 1: “Snows of Chomolungma” For the cost of 100 reiatsu thick snowy mists surround the opponent and the area of fighting up to about fifty feet around making it impossible to see for all in the field other than Raleigh until you reach the edge where you can see as normal. The size of the field increases with Raleigh’s strength.

Attack 2: “The Storm of the Martial Race” Upon engaging the Snows of Chomolungma Macumazahn can produce up to 5 24" kukris made of ice that attack from within the storm like hail. This attack costs an extra 50 reiatsu per blade.

Ability 3: “Hunter’s Sense” Raleigh can heighten his senses to track and perceive foes within a 75 yard radius.

 

[Eidolon]

Shikai
Release phrase: “Unveil the Eternal, Essential!” Or “Unveil, Essential!”

Form: Essential’s blade straightens, removing the standard curve of a Japanese design. It also gains significant width making it appear akin to a European bastard sword. The long ribbon that trails from the blade shortens to about half its normal length. Swirls of indigo reiatsu caress the blade’s length.

Battle Dweller’s Strength – 1% reiatsu per turn
With his muscles and spiritual pressure unchecked by his conscious thought, Kyuu’s body can force itself to strive at its physical limit during a battle. This is advantageous in that Kyuu’s damage done is increased by 10%, but the inherent danger of pressing himself so vigorously for an extended time causes him to take 5% more damage as well.

Indigo Intent – 100 reiatsu per turn
By drawing out and coating Essential with its destructive kidou energy, Kyuu is able to enhance the blade’s ability to cut through enemies and objects. Any attack that lands ignores 10% damage reduction.

Unending Desire – variable
Because Kyuu relies so heavily on close quarter’s combat and winning a battle of attrition, being held, incapacitated, or hamstrung would virtually assure his loss in battle. This truth has led to the development of this attack, which forces a large amount of Kyuu’s reiatsu out of his body violently, mixed with hints of Essential’s energy.

For those who observe, they witness a large indigo wave rushing forth from the tall warrior, only to leave lingering strands of reiatsu to cloud the air about him for a short time.

This violent ejection of reiatsu allows Kyuu to literally “blow off” negative status effects that endure on him, by paying 2x their cost. However, this doesn’t not prevent him from taking damage from effects.


Ban kai
Embrace of the Essential

Form
A violent rush of indigo reiatsu blasts forth from Kyuu, and the man gains the strength and resolve. The bastard sword that existed in his shikai state grows even larger, the ribbon trailing from the end being completely absorbed by the blade. The final size of the weapon is approximately 7’ long, with 2’ of width and several inches of thickness. It would be normally impossible for Kyuu, or anyone else for that matter, to wield such a huge blade. However, due to the substantial augmentation of his body through his bankai release, Kyuu is able to wield the blade with relative ease and control.

Around Kyuu’s figure lashes of indigo reiatsu accompanied by motes of the same type shroud him in an ominous air.

Ability
Sometimes, ones own limits of performance simply are not enough. Facing overwhelming odds, or a singularly powerful enemy can cause a warrior to be tested and found lacking sufficient skill, speed, and power to achieve victory.

By uttering the phrase “ban kai”, Kyuu casts aside his personal limit and draws upon the power of his zanpakutou to infuse his body and magnify his power. By reinforcing his muscles and spiritual pressure with a flow of Essential’s reiatsu, he is able to drastically increase his body’s reaction time and overall speed of movement.

This results in a 45% boost to his Hohou stat.

Titan’s Surge – 2 % reiatsu per turn
By spending 2% of his own reiatsu per turn to control the arcs of Essential’s energy, Kyuu is able to reinforce and magnify his strength. Kyuu’s unnaturally increased strength allows him to strike with improved force and skill, causing him to deal 30% more damage. However, such reckless abandon has a cost on his body and leaves him
often in vulnerable positions, causing him to take 15% more damage from attacks.

Indigo Resolve – Variable
When unscathed or lightly injured, it is impossible for Kyuu to draw on the depths of fury and contempt needed to properly execute this attack. As such, until he receives at least 25% of his reiatsu in damage, this functions like the shikai version, Indigo Intent. By paying 100 reiatsu, Kyuu can bypass 10% damage.

However, when injured, Kyuu is able to augment this attack to match the increased strength of his ban kai. By paying 1% of his reiatsu per turn, he is able to summon forth a much stronger host of Essential’s energy to wreath his blade. This allows him to ignore damage resistance of his enemy. If Kyuu’s blade is halted, he can force the reiatsu from the blade to launch forth, bypassing a barrier that has a strength less then or equal to his reiatsu damage taken.

Indomitable Soul – variable
While the ability to shrug off status effects with his initial release is potent, it is extremely taxing. When in his ban kai state, Kyuu needn’t spend nearly as much of his own reiatsu when forcing off debilitating effects, as he now has the power of his zanpakutou to rely upon. Instead of paying 2x, he now only pays the matching cost. However, he still takes damage from effects that do such.

 

[Rufus]

First Stage Awakening: Psychic Empathy

Ability 1: Psionic Form
Basically:

• Becka can shift her body into a basically intangible state, like a ghost. In psionic form, her flesh is made of concepts and emotions and psychic energies.
• All physical attacks deal 50% damage. Attacks that are heavily energy/reiatsu based, like kidou or ginto or AH telepathy, deal double damage.
• Physical forces have no sway on Becka in this form. Not wind, not gravity (so she can float and fly), not friction. However, like other forms of energy, she cannot breach walls or other solid barriers.
• Her clothes transform with her. I can explain it away as clothes-being-an-extension-of-her-psychic-self-image, but really it's just less embarrassing.
• Costs 100 reiatsu to shift in and out of Psionic Form.

Ability 2: Empathy
Basically:

• In everyday life, Becka can feel the general emotional states of everybody around her (the range is about eye-line).
• This means vague emotions, like whether a person is sad or happy or guilty or scared. She is generally able to detect lies and deceptions by sensing guilt or tension.
• That said, this is not telepathy and specific thoughts and ideas cannot be sensed.
• This is a passive effect and is on at all times, like her five human senses. It does not cost anything to use or to prolong, and is arguably just a supernatural extension of Becka's excellent people skills.
• When in Psionic Form, this ability is amplified. Becka can then broadcast any kind of emotion (one at a time), and individuals around her will be affected into feeling the same sort of emotion. She can choose to ease up these effects on allies, but they will still be able to feel hints of it.
• Small emotions like glee or disappointment don't take any power to generate, and have little to no impact. However, during battle Becka often uses two extreme polar emotions (cost 5% reiatsu with each manifest), and these are:

• Inspiring Gladness allows all allies surrounding Becka to suddenly gain a positive force of mind. Whilst the effects are not a definite buff on any of their stats, individuals fighting under this mood often show extra perseverance and confidence. Techniques that work only 1/4 of the time might improve its chances to 1/2 instead. The closer one is to Becka, the more one's mood is affected.
• Crushing Despair creates a mixture of terror, grief and hopelessness that overcomes Becka's enemies. Enemies a few metres away may just feel a slight pressure in their head, or perhaps gain a faint background headache. Closer proximity may cause intense shivering, lack of concentration and trigger quiet flight instincts. If Becka is channeling Crushing Despair and touches an individual close to her own spiritual strength, that person may become petrified for up to thirty seconds (and retain some emotional trauma afterwards, symptoms of which are the proximity effects listed above). The effects vary with the victim's strength; it may range from (in extreme cases) unconsciousness to a throbbing headache to a glum expression.

Probably not a very conventional sort of kai? I'm very welcome to suggestions/criticism, and am willing to think up something else if it just doesn't work.

There's a bunch of visual description that goes with it - she glimmers such-and-such way in Psionic Form - but they aren't relevant and don't affect anything; on the off-chance you need to know, ask me and I'll post them.

 

[Fuzakeru]

Denki Naminori - Electrical Surfing

Denki Naminori
Ability - Electrical Surfing

The young, pink haired nymph is able to transform her body in to raw power and possess any technological device. This means that possessing a toaster or television offers her no resistance and is easily infiltrated and controlled. ( Using hard lines in phones to travel from one area to another with ease and roaming around cyber space through a computer, laptop, phone, etc )

Still existing are the viruses, trojans, and other spy ware programs just anxious to infect and destroy anything it comes in contact with. However, her increase in power and understanding of her ability and the worlds she can now enter, her body rejects these harmful predators.

If the device Chisame is in, is destroyed and she’s unable to escape ( an easier task if she’s hooked up through a system that’s connected to other appliances ) then she sustains injuries reflecting the nature of the attack when she is rematerialized.

For every time Chisame possesses a device there is a 2% cost of reaitsu she must pay.

Chisame's ability to jump in to electrical devices from before + ....

Riariti Ge-mu
Ability – Reality Game

Hopping in to computers and games has become a second nature to the blue eyed youth but... what if she could pull things out? This is what Chisame’s new found power allows. Using electric particles in our world, Chisame can upload creatures, objects, and people residing in the cyber worlds she creates and uses them to do her biding in the real world. Drawing out these kinds of things is toll taking and costs Chisame 10% of her Reiatsu bring them to life. ( Objects cost only 2% to draw out given their inatimate nature. )

Upon summoning a monster, the Resistance and Combat stat is pooled together to be distributed to her creature. ( The creatures stat layout is just like that of a hollows. )

Reiatsu – The sum of all stats
Rage – The creature’s combat potential. Rage measures the skill using a claws, fangs, tentacles, or whatever the particular beast has grown ( or whatever weapon type it uses ).
Agility – The monster’s speed.
Ability – This stat governs how strong a creature’s ability is. A creature is allowed to pick two of the five set abilities to use in combat. ​

Abilities -
Can only pick two of the five below. ( Strength based on the Ability stat of the monster thus the percentages. )

Voltage Spike
The creature gathers electircal energy and releases it in to either a violent beam or a whip of chained lightning at the cost of 2% of the monster’s Ability stat.

Explosive Surge
Condenses loose electricity and mixes it with reaitsu to create a powerful electro-spiriton explosion. The shock wave after the initial explosion expands outwards of 35 feet. This conductive mixture can be applied anywhere withint a 300 ft circumfrence at the cost of 8% of the Agility Stat.

Firewall
Chisame has always been one to take things quite literally. Firewall creates a firey construct that is configured to permit, protect, deny, decrypt, and destroy anything that comes close to its flames. ( Laymen’s term: It’s a big wall of fire. Even if you put out the fire…its still a big, strong wall. ) To use Firewall the monster must detract 10% of its Ability stat.

DDOS
A creature carrying a DDOS encryption is able to infect its opponent upon physical contact. The code floods its victim and ‘denies service’ to its resources, hindering abilities temporarily from functioning properly. ( Meaning kidou, feats, techs, and kai abilities are hindered; however, forms are unaffected. Meaning, she can stop you from using your Shi Kai abilities but not its form. ) Transfering such a thing takes a toll on the beast and costs the monster 15% of its Ability stat.

System Restore
It’s a shame our bodies aren’t able to set restart points but with this ability Chisame is able to heal herself if previously wounded or attacked during the summoning and control her monster. If needed, Chisame can pull from her monster’s Reaitsu to heal her wounds but at the cost of weakening the summoned beast. Light to moderate wounds costs 2% reiatsu while heavier wounds detract 5% from the beast.

 

[FogOverLondon]

..........................I'm waiting until after PMs

 

[DarkToaster]

Alright Vanties the Underwear for Two, you are APPROVED. Go make skeeter pay!

 

[Code of the Noble]

Hey Beth,

I am reposting a link to my Kai so you don't have to hunt the next time you review. I did change the things you request per our chat on AIM a while ago. Sorry for the confussing wording, it was one of those "I knew what I meant and put it down on paper wrong" moments. Anyway here is the linku.

http://www.bleachforums.com/showpost.php?p=835694&postcount=170

 

[Thusdus]

(O)Dajuan Washington {AH} Edited

Initial Release: Darkness' Embrace

Manifestation: Darkness in the immediate area gathers and collects on the ground around him and collects in a swirling pattern on his arms and upper body, like a large tattoo. To anyone except Dujuan these shadows are icy in nature, feeling as though they are somewhere between 30 and 15 degrees Fahrenheit.

Element:Shadow

Ability 1: Dajuan can create any type of ammunition with the shadows on his person or any shadow within 10 yards. For long-range offense, Dajuan can create an explosive projectile borne of darkness in the form of bullets or a single "grenade" For example, shadow-based bullets can be created inside of the chamber or magazine of any weapon for a cost of 50 reiatsu. He can only make 5 of these bullets per turn. On the other hand, Dajuan can also make up to two "grenades", but it costs 3% of his total reiatsu for each.Dajuan can also create shadow versions of any bladed or blunt weapon for close quarters for 1%-3% reiatsu each.

Ability 2: A big fan of silent hunting , Dajuan can cover his entire body with darkness. While Dajuan's body is immersed in shadow, he becomes completely invisible when in areas that have low light.

 

[tminus31]

Name: Aikugi (Double Headed Nail)

Manifestation: Aikugi takes the form of a male, silver-furred cat with both a short attention span and sarcastic, unhelpful demeanor. He has amber eyes and a silver piercing on the left ear.

Command: Double The Cut, Aikugi

Element: N/A

Form: Aikugi takes the form of a Japanese Crusader Sword, a double bladed katana. The only difference from a regular Crusader is that the hilt is shorter and the blades are longer. The ribbons from the sealed form are wrapped around the hilt of the sword.

Basically.....

Abilities:

Zanjutsu Boost (Constant): Upon release, Kazuma gains a 5% increase in his Zanjutsu stat.

Tawami (Deflection): Kazuma’s defence technique. After the expenditure of 1% Reiatsu, Aikugi is spun vertically in front of Kazuma and is able to deflect some shots and blows. This technique can be performed with or without Kazuma holding on to the hilt.

Bohyouken (Gravestone Blade): Upon the expenditure of 5% Reiatsu, Kazuma embeds Aikugi into the ground which in turn causes blades to rise from the ground at the opponent's location and impale said opponent. The number of blades that emerge increases as Kazuma's connection stat rises, meaning at 1000 connection there will be 1 blade emerging, at 2000 connection, 2 blades will emerge up to a maximum of 10 blades (ie 10,000 connection).​

 

[rickshawman]

Dunno if this will fly; let me know, I can work up something else if it's too strange. Trying to make something a little bit different than the normal 'elemental' stuff and tie it into a later storyline. This is for my AH, Ayden Hawke.

I'm wondering if the second ability would work better as a percentage of reiatsu distributed, instead of my chapter grade. Idk, anyway!


[Initial Discovery "" El Rey Hueco]:


[Ability] Fealty
+A hollow that has less than 50% of Ayden's reiatsu can fall under his control; directed verbally and mentally, it becomes a "˜pawn' of his spiritual army. Although it can roam freely, the hollow answer to his summons immediately. Hollows affected by this ability appear with a noticeable split down the center of their masks. A maximum of three hollows can be "˜possessed', and this burns 3% reiatsu in combat. Note that hollows must be registered in the hollow list, and only one may be gained and/or lost by this technique per week.

[Ability] Tribute
+Hollows thrive on the souls of others, but Ayden's unique bond with these creatures allows them to share his strength as well. This manifests itself in the ability to distribute 20% of his grade among one of his current hollows' statistics (he receives the full grade himself, though). This is also added to a hollow's Emptiness. If a hollow is killed or abandoned, then these gains are lost for good.

[Ability] Protectorate
+Simply stated, Ayden can utilize any techniques or abilities his "˜possessed' hollows know. The costs for these techniques are satisfied by the hollows themselves (so their Rage/Emptiness is expended), although the actual reiatsu comes from Ayden at a rate of 150% the original cost. Note that only abilities with quantifiable, approved costs can be used.

 

[louhi]

Week 53 Evals​

Raleigh - approved w/ changes (you don't need to post again)

form: fine
ability: fine
attack: change the cost per blade to 50
2nd ability: doesn't need a cost



Rufus - approved


Steph - approved with changes

ability/electrical surfing: fine
riariti ge-mu:

For DDOS, limit the effect to one ability per 15% hit (a single feat, tech, kai ability, etc), counting kidou as a single ability. also needs a specific time limit, maybe 10 turns



Lambo - wait til after PMs


Sene - approved w/ changes

I really dislike the idea of a shikai that forces you to pay every turn it is active, but if that's what you want...

ability/will power: seems like you fixed it for the most part although it's still very math-y. you'll have to keep track of this for yourself during fights. you also need to cap the amount of damage reduction he can get, rather than just having it increase forever. cap at 25% damage reduction

attack/ifu: remove this part, The strength of this attack equals (200 + the expended reiatsu, which is 1% reiatsu times the number of turns the shikai has been active). damage just doesn't really work that way. You can state in general terms that the strength of the attack grows the longer your kai has been active, but an exact number doesnt work here.

ability/ikioi shihai: kind of weird and doesnt seem to fit with the rest of your kai but okay.


thus - approved

random - approved

rick - you have a cool idea going on but definitely still needs some refining, i don't think a normal review will help you at the moment.. well, lemme see what i can suggest at least.

the hollow list itself is pretty much defunct right now (the guy who was working on it quit) so basing around that isn't a good idea, but you can make an ability like that and use it on any hollows, even NPC that you create. in the end what you get is something more along the lines of a summon, esp since you are distributing stats. Kind of like doc's orcus.

I'm not sure if you want to go this route though since hollows are like everyone's biggest target and they're going to get attacked/purified/whatever by ppl who arent going to care that it's your pets xD so rather than investing something in them that you cant get back its probably better to treat them as errr.. disposable. haha. Anyways i suggest talking to moot (darktoaster) for some help to make this work better, esp since he can help you tie it in with the cerberus vibe. They have their own sciency names for hollows and reiatsu and things like that and don't understand it in the same way as shinigami do, so that might also be a factor.

 

[Shiggtyluffluff]

Third BK attack. It's short and simple I hope : (

Spiral Shift – Rasen ten’i

By expanding 5% Reiatsu Atsuma can shift Kanaduchi’s massive body to any location within 100 yards of his current location. The Valkyrie appears in this new place in a spiral of energy, re-forming her body just long enough to execute one attack before she immediately returns to Atsuma. The speed at which the transfer happens is dependent on Atsuma's hohou. (Note – The draining field remains with Atsuma during the shift)

 

[rickshawman]

decided that I wanted to change my idea up a bit, because dabbling with hollows seemed a little too dark of an ability. question: can I add abilities later on, when they become plot-line relevant? or no .. ?


[Ability - Deconstruction]

Ayden gains the ability to drain hollows of the corruption that plagues their hearts, reverting them back into normal, physical human beings; this takes ten percent of his reiatsu. These humans regain their previous personalities (although the souls of killers and such cannot be redeemed); however, the massive compression of spiritual energy into their forms causes them to gain a single ability, reminiscent of an awakened human.

All affected by this power have a small tattoo of their hollow mask located somewhere on their body. It should be noted that the 'deconstructed' retain a strong kinship with Ayden because of his part in their salvation and obey him. All abilities must be registered (as well as the 'deconstructed' registered as NPCs), and are allowed a stat distribution equal to the sum of Ayden's Combat plus Resistance (which grow when Ayden's stats grow). Only one hollow can be 'deconstructed' a week.​

 

[WhiteWoveCleric]

Shikai​

Name: Kyoujin (Assassin’s Dagger)

Command: Bring about peace, Kyoujin!

Appearance: When speaking the command phrase, Naoko holds her wakizashi in front of her and plunges it into her heart. Instead of cutting her it becomes a part of her and she momentarily appears as lavender light very faint for about two seconds. When she reappears she is holding two weapons. One is a blood red dagger and the other is a dagger with a brown hilt and a silver blade. They are approximately the same length.

Kyoujin

http://img231.imageshack.us/my.php?image=kyoujinshikaimr1.jpg

sorry about there not beibg an image here, for some reason it won't show the picture so I put in the link for you to go to.

Spirit: Kyoujin appears to Naoko as a shrouded male figure who wears all black and has his face covered. The clothing is close fitting for maximum movability. He is often very mysterious and refers to himself as “The Silent Assassin.” He feels that Naoko can learn from her own mistakes and often lets her fall. However he helps her often when he knows that she needs him most.

Ability: Upon release Kyoujin increases Naoko’s Kidou stat by 5%.

Attack: “Jakudoku” (Weak Poison)
Kyoujin’s red blade is coated with a thin layer of an oily sleek substance. This is a mild toxin that causes the victim to feel ill. As a result, their movement’s become sluggish and less skillful. All stats, including reiatsu, of the victim are reduced by 2% of Naoko’s Reiatsu for five turns. The effects of this attack begin after Naoko make’s a solid strike on the opponent. It costs 5% Reiatsu to use.

Attack: “Mahi” (Paralysis)
Kyoujin’s silver blade is coated with a thin layer of an oily sleek substance as well. Upon striking with this blade, for one turn plus an additional turn for every 1000 reiatsu Naoko is higher than her opponent the victim is affected as though they were under the influence of Bakudou Two Nisai with a minor exception. The victim cannot break the effects unless their effective reiatsu is at least 5% greater than Naoko’s reiatsu. It costs 5% kidou everytime used.

 

[Shadowwind]

Disclaimer

Because of PMs and my decision to change castes I think a new kai is in order. Hope you don't mind looking at this version.

Release Phrase: Sever, Yuutai Indou

Unrealeased: In her sealed state Indou is a 8" tanto. The hilt is 6" and appears to be made of a charred black wood. It lacks a definate guard, instead it has a series of pieces of silver metal looking to be the same as the blade.
Form: The need for Indou to take on a more support based role has driven her very essence to change. Her new form is now a staff, six feet long and charred black in color. Running down the weapon are a series of grooves and engravings varying in both shape and size.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

Ability: Katawa (Distortion): In order to become more precise in battle, the staff can alter its size to whatever Torai needs. However this ability can only be used to shrink the size of the original weapon, up to six inches in length.

Ability: Anpurifaia (Amplifier): By paying 100 reiatsu, Indou is able to channel sound waves generated from the air to function as a blade though in order for this to work the staff must be in motion for the air to run down the engravings. The size of the cut inflicted is relative to what size the staff is at the time and travels at whatever angle its fired from for 10m before dispersing. The blade itself has no physical weight and will continue forward in the direction it was launched until it reaches its length or makes contact with an organic being. It can be disrupted from its hardened state by a strike of a spiritual weapon (Quincy Arrows, AH releases/Orpheus' guns, and Zanpakutous).

Vizard Attack: Otohana (Sound Blossom):By paying 5% reiatsu, 10% rage and generating 5%emptyness Torai is able to unleash this attack. By first spinning the staff before slamming it into the ground the sound generated from the weapon is transferred downward. The waves then spread outward in eight directions resembling a vines for 5m gaining 1m per 1000 connection up to 15m. Once the waves hit their furthest point they spiral around looking like flower blossoms before exploding upward hitting all those in the pattern, acting like a giant sword swing.

 

[Lady Stumble]

Here I go

Go ahead release staff and do your worst ;D

Shikai​

Spirit Name
Kokoro no Hitotsuboshi (Heart’s Morning Star)

Spirit Manifestation
A large female wolf with white wings, Kokoro no Hitotsuboshi has a myriad of violet tribal markings covering her white fur. She has thick fur at her legs, saber fangs, and eyes the same color as Okaeshin’s. To her, Okaeshin is just a grown up baby sister. Kokoro cares about her deeply, but is not above teasing her relentlessly whenever the opportunity arises. Equally as playful, but a lot more sensible, she complements her wielder’s youthful recklessness with her wisdom, but gets easily frustrated when her advice is not heeded.

Kokoro no Hitotsuboshi

Command
“Sing with Abandon”

Released Form
When Okaeshin strikes her sealed zanpakutou vertically in the ground, the impact sets a vibration (similar to a tuning fork), and as she speaks the release command, Kokoro elongates and forms another blade on the opposite end of the hilt. Engraved in the blades are tribal markings, tinged slightly violet in the carved metal. Two white ribbons lead from either end of the hilt, which changes little, only lengthening for a wider grip. The blades continue to vibrate setting a low, musical hum. Kokoro no Hitotsuboshi has the ability to utilize sound in its attacks and abilities.

Shikai Form

Ability- Strategic: Tomonari (Resonance)
Strengthening the hum of her blades by singing softly with it, Okaeshin can reverberate objects, and in receiving the disturbance of the air in return, she can map out the affected area in a 50 feet radius, including anything or any person within it. At first, she is only able to pierce one layer and for one turn before losing her control, be it through floor or wall with a thickness of 3 feet. Every 500 connection, she can penetrate another layer and gain a turn of control. Subtle and efficient, this ability is difficult to detect unless those in the affected area have reiatsu 1.5 times that of Okaeshin’s.

Each turn costs 100 reiatsu with a constant additional cost of 5% for every additional 50 feet per use.

Rping facts
The hum and song are audible to those within a 20 feet radius of Okaeshin, and cannot be heard through a wall. The steady sound is punctuating by a rhythm of beats, giving it the musical quality of a hymn. Useful for mapping enemy territory and for search and rescue.

Ability- Defensive: Mushinoiki (Faint Breath)
By spinning Kokoro no Hitotsuboshi around her body in accordance to her target, Okaeshin can send a high frequency wave of sound over an object or person, affecting the molecules in the air and causing a chaotic reflection of light on the molecules. The target is then covered under a rippling blur of air, effectively making it difficult for an enemy to observe. However, this takes intense concentration, and once the blades stop, even for an instant, the cover disappears. At 1.5 times the hohou of Okaeshin, an enemy can begin to distinguish through the mirage. Every 200 hohou increase starting at 600 ho means Okaeshin can project the sound to an additional target, with a cost of 2% reiatsu per target.

Rping facts
The sound cover, only heard by the target, is a different tune for each person, depending on the person’s spirit affinity, due to the need to conform with the target’s own reiatsu. Ex: a calm fighter with windkai may hear a soft, breathy song.

Ability- Direct: Baion Atsureki (Harmonic Discord)
Whether with her body or any part of her zanpakutou, Okaeshin, once she makes contact with a person, can send a sound wave through their body. A low frequency wave can stabilize internal injuries (ie, slowing blood flow, supporting bone structure). A high frequency can damage internal organs (ie, bursting blood vessels, shattering bones). Starting out with minor injuries and small, weak organs, she can move onto major wounds and organs as her zanjutsu statistic increases in general increments of 200 zan for each level of healing or harming.

Levels

600- slow blood flow, burst small blood vessels (bruises)
800- support weak muscles and bones, burst minor blood vessels
1000- support fractured bones and pulled muscles, twist minor muscles (sprains)
1200- support broken bones, weaken tendons (immobilization)
1400- stop blood flow, burst blood vessels
1600- twist major muscles (immobilization), crack bones
1800- burst major arteries

Each use costs 5% reiatsu for damaging and 5% reiatsu for stabilizing.

Rping facts
The healing is accompanied by a soothing hum which can calm, and the harming is accompanied by a piercing screech which can disorient. Both of these are audible only to the target. Additionally, when using the ribbons as a channel for the sound wave, the ribbons harden as they wrap around their target, changing into a soft, malleable glass.